May 28th last year was a very exciting day for us. We received word from the orphanage that Wei Wei had been told she was being adopted. They sent us pictures and a video of her with our picture in her hands and being read our first letter to her. The joy of that moment for us is still fascinating and emotional. We could see the curiousness she had as well. A little more than a year later it has become very hard. Hard to stay positive. Hard to stay focused. Hard to stay confident. It has become easy to be negative about the whole process. When I was in high school marching band and we were on the field for hours in the summer heat practicing I would want to quit. Our director told me something I have not forgotten. “You can stand anything as long as you know when it will end.” I have used this quote to get me through many things I wanted to quit but it really doesn’t apply here. There is no date or clock to countdown. There is only waiting. Yes, everyday should be a day closer but that too has become hard to hold onto.
Knowing we are not alone is helpful. There are around 400 families in the US alone that are waiting and I don’t know how many more across the globe wait to bring their child home. I have texted some and read others comments and stories on different Facebook group sites. We have encouraged our Senators and Congressmen to try to get the Secretary of State to engage diplomatically. We wish there was a paper to chase or a document to have signed that would keep us busy but there is not. I open my Facebook and just about everyday I have memories from May and June show up from last year. All the Adoption T-shirts we sold and the flocking of yards with pink flamingos make me smile because I think about how much we have been blessed with friends and family that have supported us in this journey. At the same time it makes me a little sad because we really thought we would be reposting these memories with a picture of Wei Wei with us by now.
I would say the thing that has become most difficult lately besides the wait is the questions from family, friends, and co-workers. “So how’s the adoption going?” or “Any word on travel yet?” These are simple questions and I really don’t mind answering them. They are questions of concern and hope. It is just a reminder that I have no idea as to when things will proceed and I have no control over any of it. I know other families feel the same way. We are all in similar circumstances but I can see how hope can dim and a negative attitudes can crept in. I am so very thankful for the HOPE I have in Christ. I know that He is my first love and that there is nothing I can’t lay at His feet. Nothing that He can’t bear for me and nothing He is not aware of. I need to fast on His Word when the questions, the doubt and the worry rears its head. I ask that you join me in prayer for the kids and families that wait but more so pray for the families who don’t have the hope that we have in Christ. I also want to say “I love you” to my wife, Shelly. My love for you has never been greater and I am glad to be walking through life with you.
Wei Wei, we love you.
